How come he only texts me, and never calls? He doesn’t want to talk to you, he’s not that into you —My girlfriend isn’t affectionate, why? She doesn’t want to touch you, nor does she want you touching her because she’s not into you—My boyfriend cheated on me, why? She was hot and he’s not that into you—How come I haven’t met his family? He doesn’t want to marry you and he’s not into you—My man doesn’t tell me he loves me, what should I do? Leave him because he doesn’t love you and he’s not that into you—Why does my girl flirt with other guys in front of me when she knows it hurts my feelings? She doesn’t respect you AND she’s not that into you—Why won’t he commit? He’s not into you—Why does my girlfriend still want to talk to her ex? She’s still into him, not you—My lady never wants to have sex, what’s up with that? She doesn’t like sex…especially with you because she’s not that into you—My man never compliments me? He doesn’t have anything nice to say (because he’s not that into you), so he says nothing at all…
Hopefully, you sensed a pattern. About 90% of the time, if we are not getting the commitment, time and attention we want in our relationship, the reason why is quite simple – he or she is just not that into you.
Self-proclaimed relationship gurus are making millions by telling women what they should change to hook a husband (Why Men Marry Bitches) or what they should stop doing to make a man fall in love (Think Like a Man) when the answer is simple. The reality is, one day you will meet a man or a woman who likes/loves you – as weird, unattractive, annoying and awkward as you are.
To put my theory into perspective, I will leave you with this:
Think of your celebrity crush…Why celebrities? Because seemingly they have it all – money, looks, fame and personality – at least that’s the assumption. Assuming the object of your partner’s affection is all they thought they would be, do you think they would behave in a manner that would sabotage their chances of success with that person? I know that if today, TJ Holmes left his wife and scoured the earth to find me, I’d do whatever it took to stay in his good graces and I imagine his graces are GOOD.
I know the truth hurts and I hate to be the bearer of bad news in stating the obvious, but believe me, I am speaking to myself, as well. We’ve all found ourselves praying, wishing and hoping that the one we love will love us back with the same intensity, but sometimes it’s just not meant to be, and we have to be brutally honest with ourselves, brush our shoulders off and move on.
Do you find yourself over-analyzing your relationships? Do you agree that if your partner isn’t putting forth the effort necessary to sustain the relationship, that person is not that into you? Or, do you feel there are other factors that can keep your partner from allowing the relationship to reach its full potential?