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Nine-to-Fiving is for the birds


Don’t speak for me…YOU can do it!

     So, my new thing now is saying “for the birds.”  Everything I don’t like is for the birds, and right now, working is that thing.  I think if there were as many ways to kill time back when the Feminist Movement began, many women would have been quite content with their role as homemaker – at least I would have been – because “nine-to-fiving” is for the birds.

First of all, women should have been given the opportunity to opt in or out of the Feminist Movement.  And, don’t “movements” come to an end?  If so, why must women still act out our “new” roles as providers, borne from this movement spearheaded by our bra-burning ancestors?  The Civil Rights Movement ended, and we retained the same rights acquired largely due to its success, but racism is still alive and well.  So, why haven’t men reverted back to their chivalrous ways – laying jackets over puddles and expecting no more than a kiss on the cheek after sharing a strawberry milkshake or a piece of pie at the local diner?  And why is it now unacceptable for a woman to actively seek a “job” as a homemaker without being labeled a golddigger?

I don’t mean to sound ungrateful. After all, many advantages came with our new-found liberty, such as the right to vote, reproductive rights and equal pay.  However, I don’t necessarily buy into the notion, that “anything men can do, we can do better.”  And, why did the feminist movement have to take on such a competitive spirit?  Couldn’t we have gained these freedoms without commencing a perpetual battle of the sexes?

This is just ridiculous.

Now I have to be “independent” and fend for myself in a male-dominated society, coping with sexual harrassment and sexism while, at the same time, trying to break through glass ceilings; and on top of all that, at home, we are still expected to cheerfully perform our “womanly” or “wifely” duties.  Don’t you see! Feminism tripled our workload!  It didn’t rid us of our roles as nurturer and caregiver, nor did we swap responsibilities with men.  Now, it’s proclaimed throughout middle-class households all across America, that husbands and wives are TEAMS…Yay! Super!

I just wanted the right to vote.  I didn’t want to have to bring home the bacon and cook it too.  Furthermore, I’m tired of men singing all these songs about female independence being so sexy. I bet it is sexy that they’re no longer solely responsible for the financial well-being of their families, and they can work half as much as they used to and still receive the same “benefits” they enjoyed when they were the only ones “hunting and gathering.”

Ladies, we’ve been hoodwinked and bamboozled.  I bet a man started the feminist movement, and came up with that lousy slogan to go along with it.  I know I’m not alone in this sentiment because nowadays women are going to great lengths to meet and marry a man of unlimited means.  I’m not saying I encourage it, but I understand.

She’s faking it.

     At what point, and why did our ability to bear and rear children, while successfully managing a household, become a dishonorable or trivial occupation, so much so that we felt our talents and intelligence would be better suited for work outside of the home?  Are we truly happy with the outcome of the women’s movement?  I’ll be the first to admit, I’m not, because nine-to-fiving is for the birds.

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Discussion

14 thoughts on “Nine-to-Fiving is for the birds

  1. “fend for myself in a male-dominated society, coping with sexual harrassment and sexism while, at the same time, trying to break through glass ceilings;” Clearly you have no concept of what feminism really is, because it is precisely this male-dom society/harrassment culture/sexism/glass ceilings problem that feminists are fighting. FOR YOU. Feminism is not about making you work 80 hours a week and then come home and make dinner and f*ck with a stepford wives smile on your face. It’s about letting you make the choices that suit you, and that goes for women who are traditional and non traditional. get a little education before you start spouting about what feminism is and is not.

    Posted by Heidi | June 17, 2011, 8:26 PM
    • “Clearly you have no concept of what feminism really is, because it is precisely this male-dom society/harrassment culture/sexism/glass ceilings problem that feminists are fighting. FOR YOU. ”

      As I stated in the article, The Feminist Movement has been phenomenal in helping us to acquire certain rights, but it has also placed a bunch of ADDITIONAL undue burdens and responsibilities on MY shoulders, that I wish didn’t exist.

      “Feminism is not about making you work 80 hours a week and then come home and make dinner and f*ck with a stepford wives smile on your face. It’s about letting you make the choices that suit you, and that goes for women who are traditional and non traditional. get a little education before you start spouting about what feminism is and is not.”

      I never said what feminism is or is not. I simply pointed out the unfavorable results of the movement, how it has affected gender roles in our society, and how that has disturbed the male-female dynamic in terms of relationships. Feminism may not have been about adding to our responsibilites, but that is what it has inadvertently done. Women are expected to do it all! They’re having nervous breakdowns trying to be “hot” moms, breadwinners, and wives all at the same time. It’s simply too much for one person to handle. If you’re happy with this way of life, more power to you. But, I wouldn’t mind reverting back to a more traditional way of life when women were only expected to take care of home.

      Lastly, your suggestion that “I get a little education” is unfounded since, in your response, you failed to tell me anything about feminism that I don’t already know. Seeing as how I am well aware of both the positive and negative attributes of feminism I doubt that anything you mention would be “new” to me or would cause me to change my mind, but feel free to take a stab at it.

      Posted by thirtythoughts | June 17, 2011, 10:18 PM
  2. Thirty… It is nice to know women are starting realize how feminism, sex rev, etc… is CRAMPING a woman’s swag…

    Now that you have demanded equality… Courtship & marriage goes the way of the dinosaurs…

    Men see no need to be a provider, husband… I have opted out if looking to provide for a woman… And decide to cashing on the sex revolution (sleep with multiple women with little investment)

    What is the #1 thing hurting women today is female hypergamy… (NOBODY ADDRESSES THIS IN THE WOMAN BLOGOSPHERE) While women are making money, THEY STILL WANT A MAN WHO PROVIDES FOR THEM… & make more than them…. Who is more socially powerful than them,,, So alot of women priced themselves out of the dating market…

    And women are doing alot more thug chasing, and making babies by irresponsible men

    The men who want to provide for women are either being avoided until their late 30s (look at all the women in America dying to find a husband around that age), sleeping around… Or they are exploiting these men, breaking their hearts & leaving these men bitter & they end up becoming players, opting out of the dating market, etc… & hoping that these men will be around in their 30s to provide for them and be ROLES MODELS for their illegitimate children (even though the man she made him with, was a loser, and wasn’t checking for winning qualities…)

    Women are waking up TOO LATE… TOO LATE…

    So maybe feminists have liberated women, but at the expense of SOCIETY… Not respecting biology & psychology of the genders….

    I know we can do a 180 and roll it back somewhat… But I think we are so far gone…

    And I am just adjusting to my environment… & the new dating marketplace…

    Men’s only crime was not pushing back the BS

    I hope more women will wake up & start closing their legs & invest heavily into their black males…

    Posted by Adonis | July 18, 2011, 1:48 AM
    • Adonis:
      Thanks for your comment.
      Although I agree that the feminist movement has changed the dating scene tremendously and created a dynamic I don’t quite care for, as to the article you posted about women “digging jerks,” I must disagree. See https://thirtythoughts.wordpress.com/2011/04/14/nice-guys-do-not-finish-last/ . I don’t agree, at all, with the conclusion drawn by the author of the article based on the number of children inmates have in comparison to non-criminals. Not only are these numbers more than likely in accurate, the thought of drawing such a correlation is absurd.

      I don’t think it’s too late to change things, but many women, including one that responded to this article, don’t share my sentiments. I am all for female empowerment, but, as I stated, I don’t like the competitive nature of the feminist movement. Men and women need to embrace their differences and admit that in some areas where men fail, women thrive and vice versa. Also, I think that this disconnect is more prevalent in the Black community, which would explain the disparaging numbers in marriage rates compared to other races of men and women. https://thirtythoughts.wordpress.com/2011/04/08/always-a-babys-mama-never-a-bride/

      I’m not sure what you meant when you said you are “adjusting to your environment.” Please explain. 30

      Posted by thirtythoughts | July 18, 2011, 8:28 AM
  3. YES! I completely agree with you–it’s not that women are incapable compared to men, simply that we are biologically equipped to excel in DIFFERENT areas. That doesn’t make one gender better than the other, but the fact is that women’s bodies are made to produce children so it shouldn’t be seen as shameful or a waste for us to take on that nurturing role. I blogged about this awhile ago ( http://wp.me/pDkzA-h ) and as I continue my education through law school the topic keeps coming up. One married classmate is trying to get pregnant before we graduate because she plans to work at a big firm, and won’t have the time then. It’s crazy! I grew up with a stay at home mom and I know my siblings & I are all better off because of it. She worked part time, but was always there to drop us off & pick us up from school, help us with our homework, etc.

    I’ve always been vocal about wanting to be a housewife, at least while my kids are in infancy, and gotten flack for it. But I know that I only have so much of myself to give–it’s impossible for me to be the best mom I can be, and the best lawyer I can be, at the same time. I’m not about to have a nervous breakdown trying either, especially since my fiance and I are on the same page about it.

    Posted by Brownbelle | July 22, 2011, 11:57 PM
    • @Brownbelle – I think a lot of women feel this way, but they don’t want to admit that they simply can’t do it all! My sister was a stay-at-home mom until her kids were well into their teens. I saw the positive impact this had on them, and sincerely want the same for my family and my children when the time comes. I think golddiggers are simply different from other women, in that they don’t want to have to do it all, and purposely seek out men that can make it so they never have to. So, they don’t want to have to work? Guess what, neither do I!! Especially, if on top of working, I have to run a home, care for kids, a cat and a golden retriever and still make time for my husband. It’s just too much!

      It’s interesting that you are studying to be an attorney because I was/am, as well and I had to take into consideration that I wanted a family in the near future, which doesn’t work out too well if you’re at a large firm working 90 hour weeks. I had to decide which was more important, excelling as an attorney or raising a family, and in the end, I realized that raising a family would ultimately take precedence over my career. Thanks for reading and commenting. Of course, I am in total agreement with your article, as well. Maybe there should be a post feminism movement in which those who choose to, go back to a more traditional way of life. Hmmmm…that would be nice

      Posted by thirtythoughts | July 23, 2011, 12:48 AM
  4. It’s great that some women are waking up and a shame it’s too late, because like it or not, men are thinking revenge VS. getting along w/ women who’ve instigated this attack on us men and boys:

    “Ladies, we’ve been hoodwinked and bamboozled. I bet a man started the feminist movement, and came up with that lousy slogan to go along with it.”

    Karl Marx, and it’s a damn shame that so many followers of Feminism don’t understand WHO they got down with and WHAT they involved in. But you WILL feel the blowback, believe it.

    MEN UNITE against MISANDRIST!!!

    Posted by Craig | October 16, 2011, 11:36 PM
  5. I thought I did respond to this piece, what happened to my response?

    as if IDK

    Posted by Adobe | October 17, 2011, 12:37 AM
  6. Two things: I don’t know why I laugh so much while reading your posts, lately. I’m sure you’re not intending to come across as humorous as you are…but it’s entertaining, to say the least. I underwent a phase back in the day where I too would say certain ish was for the birds (then follow that saying with: “…and birds do fly”) which suggested to whatever person in my ears that they were free to go elsewhere with that BS.

    I feel your post. I think it’s one of those survival type deals though. I admire an independent woman, I do, but at the same time logic tells me that she would rather not be as independent although she begged to differ. I’m from the line of thought that women need men and vice verse. I’m also from the land of thought that women are (or should be) the matriarch and man the backbone of a family. So if it were financially possible for moms to stay at home and raise children and the dads bring home the bacon, then I’d vote that system número uno. As my truest belief, I’m constantly ridiculed by women for having a “caveman mentality.”

    Feminism aside, I just think all women need to really sit down and figure out what works best for them as women.

    Posted by Don | September 23, 2013, 10:15 PM
    • @Don Lol I’m not “trying” to be funny per se, but I write pretty much how I talk on a regular basis to family and friends. But, thank you either way 🙂

      I would venture to say MOST women don’t want to be as independent as they let on, especially when you’re pregnant or you have a newborn. I just think it’s impossible to do it all. At least one area of her life will lack.

      I truly do hope that when I start having babies, I can devote my time and energy to family and not a career.

      Posted by 30thoughts | September 24, 2013, 12:41 AM

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Pingback: Men are from Venus, Women are from Venus « 30thoughts - December 28, 2011

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