male box, relationship rhetoric, the rich and famous

Do You Want a Beyonce or a Michelle?


Would you want to be with the most beautiful woman in the world or the most powerful woman in the world?  I only ask because since Michelle Obama became the First Lady, I have heard many men state that they want “a Michelle.”  Obviously, they don’t actually want Michelle Obama, but they want a woman like her who exudes confidence and grace – a woman who possesses many of the same qualities and attributes as Michelle Obama, and the same ability to motivate and empower them the way Michelle did Barack.  Yet, in the same breath, they will say they want (and I quote her husband, Jay Z, directly) “a blonde with a fat ass who can sing a song,” which presumably refers distastefully to his wife, Beyonce.   Unfortunately though, you can’t have both.

Although Michelle Obama and Beyonce may possess some of the same qualities, most of what makes them who and what they are is mutually exclusive.  Certain personality traits cannot co-exist within one individual.  For instance, you can’t have a woman who is both independent and needy.  Either she will be able to stand on her own two feet or she won’t. You won’t find a conservative woman who just so happens to love dancing on tables and poles and giving lap dances.  It’s just not realistic.

There is no right or wrong answer, and neither is factually more or less desirable. It simply depends on your preference.  A Beyonce could never be a Michelle and vice versa, so it is important to decide which type of woman best suits your lifestyle and determine who would best enhance your strengths and balance out your weaknesses.

So, what’s the difference between the two? It is no secret that the two admire each other greatly for the simple fact that each possesses qualities that the other wishes they had.  Michelle appreciates Beyonce’s style and talent, while Beyonce appreciates Michelle’s intelligence and strength.

Beyonce is basically a product of the entertainment industry.  She has had no real formal education, as she became the lead singer of Destiny’s Child at the ripe age of 15.  For most of her life, she has been told what to say, what to think, where to be and how to act.  Additionally, she dated her husband Jay Z (who is almost 12 years her senior) nearly 10 years before marrying him.  He met her at an impressionable age, 18, and as a result, I’m sure he’s had quite an impact on her development as an individual, and also as a wife.

Michelle, on the other hand, was a high-powered attorney when she met Barack Obama.  She graduated at the top of her class from Princeton, received her juris doctorate from Harvard, and met the President when she was well into her 20s.  Michelle lived quite a bit and had already formed her own opinion about many things prior to meeting her future husband.  While I’m sure Barack had some influence on her thoughts and ideas, it is less likely that his influence shaped who Michelle is as an individual today.

I perceive “a Michelle” to be smart, supportive, opinionated, strong-willed, assertive, ambitious, intellectually stimulating, outspoken, independent, reserved and opinionated.  Whereas, I perceive “a Beyonce” to be more passive, but also supportive, docile, easygoing, agreeable, liberal, materialistic and malleable.  As you can see, I still do believe Michelle and Beyonce may possess a few of the same qualities, but for the most part, they are completely different in terms of what they bring to the table in a relationship.

I suppose the moral of the story is, know what you want and need in a mate, but understand that no woman can be both “a Michelle” and “a Beyonce.”  To some men, together, these women would create the perfect mate, but to their respective mates, alone, these women embody everything their husbands need.

Guys, do you think you can have it all? A woman who embodies the qualities of both Michelle Obama and Beyonce?  Which would you prefer if you could only choose one?   

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Discussion

32 thoughts on “Do You Want a Beyonce or a Michelle?

  1. I’d take Michelle any day because she is both powerful and beautiful. On another note you can have a woman with both qualities and I do believe a lot are out there. Finding them is the hard part

    Posted by petersburgh | July 27, 2012, 2:05 AM
    • I intentionally did not bring looks into it. I only mentioned personality traits. You can find a woman who is powerful and beautiful, but not the traits that I feel Michelle and Beyonce don’t have in common. Many men want an intelligent woman, but are frustrated with the fact that she’s opinionated. Or they want a woman who looks high maintenance, but isn’t high maintenance…NOT POSSIBLE.

      There was an article I linked to in the post that sparked the idea for this article. It talks about how a lot of women pray for a husband that is ambitious, but then get mad when he works too much. It’s the same concept here.

      Posted by 30thoughts | July 27, 2012, 2:22 AM
  2. SMART, SUPPORTIVE, opinionated, strong-willed, ASSERTIVE, ambitious, INTELLECTUALLY STIMULATING, outspoken, independent, reserved and opinionated. Caps are what captivates me, the others are great satellites

    Posted by petersburgh | July 27, 2012, 2:30 AM
  3. While I do think it would be comparable to finding a needle in a haystack, I believe that it is definitely possible to find both (for those who are looking for such a thing).

    As it relates to me, the traits you attributed to Michelle are much more appealing than the latter.

    Posted by Mark | July 27, 2012, 1:00 PM
  4. I think that there are women out there that would fall under your description of a “Michelle” according to this article, but that can also be a “Beyonce” at times too. As women, many of us have the unique ability to be what we need to be when we need to be it. I would like to think that I personally embody many of the qualities of both women…then again, I guess you should ask my husband. He might have a different opinion…

    Posted by Kenya | July 29, 2012, 8:23 PM
    • @Kenya – As I stated, there are similarities in the two ladies, but I am speaking more so to the characteristics that each possesses that ensures one could never be the other. This reminds me of as quote in one of my fave movies, “My Best Friend’s Wedding.” “Creme brulee can never be Jello, and vice versa.” The things I listed sort of describe their temperament. Could Jay Z handle being with someone who is intellectually smarter than him or his equal, or does he need to wear the pants at all times? Depending on the answer to this question, it would determine that one is a good fit, but not the other. I agree with you to some extent as I said they do share some of the same qualities, but certain qualities they possess cannot exist within the same person – intelligence and ignorance cannot exist together, one cannot be both reserved and flamboyant. As an entertainer, Beyonce may need to be flamboyant, but may be reserved when she’s offstage. That doesn’t make her both. It makes her reserved.

      Posted by 30thoughts | July 30, 2012, 10:56 AM
  5. Great article. I need to start following 🙂

    Posted by Uitori | August 5, 2012, 5:21 AM
  6. I’d actually say Michelle is sexier and has a way brighter smile.

    Beyonce could go to hell with all that stupid-dancing shit she does in her vids(haven’t watched 1 in over 5 years though).

    Posted by Socialkenny | August 5, 2012, 9:39 PM
    • LOL!! Do a lot of men feel this way? They must. Everyone I know and who has responded to this article say they’d like a Michelle over a Beyonce. Interesting…You hear that ladies, natural beauty and strength reign supreme!

      Posted by 30thoughts | August 6, 2012, 8:40 PM
      • Hell no!!!

        Most men I know,and most men in general drool over the thought of being with Beyonce.No guy wants a Michelle,and plus she’s a MILF,so not like a spring chicken.

        As far as strength lol,men are NOT attracted to women of power not strength.That’s actually a turnoff for us.It’s like an independent-career girl;men are afraid of them.

        Posted by Socialkenny | August 6, 2012, 9:17 PM
      • So then why would you choose a Michelle? Some men say as far as marriage, they’d pick Michelle. Please keep in mind that I am not referring to looks or sex appeal either, only character and personality.

        Posted by 30thoughts | August 6, 2012, 9:36 PM
  7. I would chose Michelle because I’m personally into women over 40(I’m 30 BTW).But men in general look for women in their 20’s.I’m just a rare specimen lol.

    Personality wise,every guy would want a house-wife type(Michelle),but in the real world,for us men,looks always trumps personality.Women are attracted to men’s personalities.Men are wired differently;personality is like 2% on the scale for us,while looks(youthfulness)is like 90%.

    My point is,men and women are different as far as attraction,courtship and relationship go.

    Posted by Socialkenny | August 6, 2012, 10:00 PM
    • I see…Could that be why so many marriages end in divorce these days?? Looks trumping personality?? Just something to ponder 🙂

      Oh I see. You like older women, but you’re not as rare as you think you are.

      Posted by 30thoughts | August 6, 2012, 10:42 PM
      • Rare in the sense that as a pick-up artist coach,I’m able to pull girls of my choice(be it age 18 or 25).But it’s a personal choice why I pick up MILF’s and Cougars.

        Difference with other men who deal with older women is that it’s not a choice most times;it’s all they can get.

        Marriage:partially that makes sense.But as a guy,I’m not gonna say that men are the cause of divorces.But true;men become physically unattracted to their wives after a certain point,so they seek younger women.

        And another thing is,this is biological and goes back to millions of years of human evolution(as we study in the seduction community).So it’s not just that we men prefer much younger women out of perversion or superficiality.It’s in our genes.All the prophets of the Bible had wives who were decades younger.

        Posted by Socialkenny | August 6, 2012, 10:57 PM
      • You’re pick up artist coach?? Never heard of such a thing lol. Please elaborate…

        Also, I’m not saying no one should desire a good looking mate, but personality should not only be a 2% factor when seeking a mate. Agreeing with you, men are visual creatures, but if they’re choosing a mate solely on looks, they’re probably making a bad decision. Since looks fade, finding someone who is good looking WITH a great personality ensures the relationship will last longer being that you still want to be around that person, you genuinely like them and they have more to offer than just a pretty face.

        I think as men mature, they realize looks aren’t everything.

        Oh and you can roll with the idea that I’m 22 lol

        Posted by 30thoughts | August 7, 2012, 12:36 AM
  8. Lol ok I’ll roll with the 22 idea.

    True!It is stupid to chose a mate based on looks,but it is what it is.Men are visual like you rightly said.

    I doubt that men mature about looks when they get older.We would want our mate to look better.Plus,look at the percentage of men who bang hookers and stuff;it’s almost always old-married men.So as men age,we desire younger-looking women.Doesn’t mean we’ll get them though.

    Posted by Socialkenny | August 7, 2012, 12:45 AM
  9. As far as pick-up artist goes,it’s a global community of guys with 1 primary goal:to seduce and bang hot women.Thus the name of our community:the seduction/PUA community.

    We have students(newbies)and coaches who teach men how to seduce women via technique,tactics and routines.

    It’s pretty much underground where much don’t know about it.The men who eventually find us are the ones who suffer greatly with getting laid,and they happen to find us via googling how to get laid or something like that.

    My blog is pretty much about seducing women(how to articles and videos).

    1 of my recent articles touched on some seduction/PUA community stuff for ppl who don’t know about it:


    Greatest PUA beefs of all time(between instructors)

    The seduction/pick-up artist community for dummies

    Posted by Socialkenny | August 7, 2012, 1:16 AM
    • Wowzers! I’ll have to check this out lol There’s a whole community??

      Posted by 30thoughts | August 7, 2012, 1:48 AM
      • Lmbao of course.A whole community of manwhores.

        Women are intrigued by it for the simple facts that they can’t believe that such a community(online and real world)exist where men are taught skills,techniques and tactics to picking up women lol.

        Most of us use nicknames with PUA(pick-up artist)on the end.Reason being(nicknames)is that after every girl we meet and bang,we have to write a Lay Report”,a detailed post on how we were able to seduce the girl.In order to stay anonymous and avoid being googled and the girl seeing the “Lay Report”,we adopt a nickname.

        Irony is,men are always the only ones to hate and say,”that shit doesn’t work”.Then next thing you know,I get an e-mail from 1 of those guys,”Hey Kenny,can you teach me”?LOL!

        But besides being about sleeping with many chics as humanly possible,our overall secondary agenda is to give women a great time opposed to 90% of men who are boring.

        Posted by Socialkenny | August 7, 2012, 2:07 AM
      • Hmmm…as a blogger this is definitely intriguing lol. As a woman, this is highly disturbing…Why do you all strive for anonymity? Is it sort of like “Hitch,” but with regard to sex, rather than finding a mate and relationships?

        It’s great that you all strive to be better lovers, but this is insane! I know you want to remain anonymous, but would you be opposed to me blogging about it in the near future? Pretty please lol

        Posted by 30thoughts | August 7, 2012, 2:15 AM
  10. I don’t strive to be anonymous.I frankly don’t care if any chic I’d slept with found out I wrote a lay report about how I seduced her.

    Adopting a seduction community nickname(Socialkenny) was just something I seen as cool.Wasn’t really to be anonymous.Although most PUA’s do it to be anonymous.

    Of course I won’t mine you blogging about this in the future.

    Afterall,this’ what I blog about and every other PUA does.

    It’s not essentially how to be better lovers.

    When I meant showing a woman a good time,I meant the overall courtship process from meet to sex.

    We don’t just go up to the target(the girl) and do and say what 90% of boring guys do and say.We have routine openers which are opening lines(not pick up lines)geared to attract the women by asking her or saying to her something interesting.

    Sort of hitch but without relationship being the 1st.goal.

    Posted by Socialkenny | August 7, 2012, 3:02 AM
  11. Sound good with the no spamming.

    For a bit more,I’d put together an article a while back featuring short videos of PUA’s(pick-up artists) in the club(on hidden camera)doing their thing.So this’ basically how we operate.Our lingo(which we have),approaches,openers,lines,cockiness,attitude,etc.

    Keys to the VIP show,picking up hot chics in the club

    Hopefully the guys who read your blog can learn a thing or 2 on being ballsy with women.

    Posted by Socialkenny | August 7, 2012, 6:06 AM

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